“Who are you to judge?” “Don’t judge!” Perhaps it’s a gaslighting tactics to get people to be quiet. Whatever the case, I think it’s been somewhat effective by making people feel mean and “judgmental” when they speak up…even when there’s a just reason to.
Last night we dug into this by unpacking Jesus’ teaching in Matthew 7:1-12. Verse one is often the verse people will use to silence others on issues or choices that go against the LORD’s will and design for life – “Do not judge…”
But what do we do with verses like Proverbs 31:9 and John 7:24?
Speak up and judge fairly;
defend the rights of the poor and needy.
Proverbs 31:9 (NIV)
Stop judging by mere appearances, but instead judge correctly. John 7:24 (NIV)
Here was our conclusion last night:
-If you want to love like Jesus, you have to learn to judge like Jesus.
-There is discernment, that is seeing something for what it really is. That’s the good kind of judgment.
-And then there is condemnation. That is seeing someone else as less than. That’s the wrong kind of judgment.
-do to others what you would have them do to you.
So…there is a place for judgment. This is a place of compassion, not condemnation; a place of humility, not pride or arrogance; a place of understanding, not manipulation or confusion.
If you want to love like Jesus, you need to learn to judge like Jesus – with compassion, humility, and truth. And when people don’t receive it, walk away (Jesus said to do so – “Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs.”)
Questions to ask at the table or when you’re driving in the car:
- Have you ever felt judged by another person? How did it feel?
- What’s something you are often judgmental towards others about?
- What do you think Jesus means when He says in the same way we judge others, we will be judged? Do you have an example of a time this happened in your life?
- Why does Jesus direct us to remove our plank before addressing someone else’s speck? How do you think we actually do that?
- Do you have a story about a time someone asked you to change something you were doing in a way that felt caring? How did they ask you?
- Has anyone ever demanded that you change something in a way that was hurtful? What was that like?
ACTION STEPS:
1. See others with eyes of COMPASSION, not CONDEMNATION.
2. REQUEST the change you want, don’t DEMAND it.
3. Lean on GOD’S strength, not YOUR own.
When it comes to judging like Jesus, which of these steps do you need to focus on?
How will you practice that this week?